Why Winter Asks Us to Let Go: Tools for Crossing Thresholds Without Losing Yourself
- Justine Ferland
- Nov 24
- 7 min read
Winter looks quiet from the outside.But it’s a season of thresholds.
A time of shifts, endings, recalibration, and the slow rebuilding of direction.
In ecological psychology, winter is understood not as stagnation, but as a metabolic pause: a natural downshift that allows organisms to conserve energy, prune what no longer serves, and create the conditions for future growth (Fuchs, 2020).
Humans are not separate from these patterns. We move through our own winters, externally as the year darkens, and internally as we bump against transitions, uncertainty, or the pull to step into a truer, more authentic version of ourselves.
The work of winter isn’t collapse and pause. It is intentional release and integration.
This article explores why winter invites letting go, how to navigate these thresholds without losing your footing, and why integration is an active skill you can train & not a passive experience that simply “happens with time.” (Sterling, 2012)
This is winter’s wisdom: integration.
What Winter Actually Asks of Us (and Why It Matters)
Every ecological system, from forests to fungi, relies on a period of strategic reduction. Trees drop their leaves not because they’re dying, but because doing so prevents dehydration and stress during low-light conditions. Animals, like bears, lower metabolic rate to preserve resources & plants pull energy inward toward their root system (Tamm & Galea, 2021).
Winter teaches a simple, evidence-backed principle:
To grow well, you must first reduce the unnecessary drains.
In psychology, this parallels:
load reduction (reducing hidden drains on cognitive, emotional, or physical energy),
interoceptive accuracy (the clarity with which you sense your internal signals), and
self-regulation (your ability to respond rather than react).
These are all processes that help you sense your internal state clearly and act with intention rather than reactivity (Barrett et al., 2016; Schulkin & Sterling, 2020).
Research in behavioral and ecological psychology shows that humans function best when we cycle between effort, integration, and intentional rest (Gibson, 2015). Winter naturally pushes us toward this integration phase- but without awareness, many people confuse this with laziness, low motivation, or failure.
The season is not asking you to collapse. It is asking you to refine.
How Winter Works on the Body and Mind
Winter shifts the way humans think, feel, and move through the natural intelligence of the body.
Across cultures and across time, winter has signaled a few things:
• Slow down so you can see more clearly.
• Return inward to sort what is ending and what wants to continue.
• Let the external quiet invite an internal reorganization.
These shifts happen through a few mechanisms:light rhythms, temperature, metabolism, movement patterns, social changes, and the psychological symbolism of the season itself. This is why winter often surfaces old stories, unprocessed emotions, or identity questions we’ve managed to outrun during busier months. (Tamm & Galea, 2021). This is orientation in action.
The science of winter on you
• Light + Circadian Regulation
Reduced daylight affects circadian timing and melatonin release, which in turn influences mood, energy, and cognitive processing (Czeisler et al., 1999; Foster, 2020).This isn’t “dysregulation” this is your bodies recalibration to a slower seasonal tempo.
• Cognitive Ease in Winter
Research in environmental psychology shows that winter environments naturally promote reflective attention, a mental mode ideal for contemplation and inner work (Kaplan, 1995; Wyles et al., 2017).
This is why winter often surfaces deeper questions about identity, purpose, and alignment.
• Somatic Shifts
Cooler temperatures alter movement patterns, breath rhythm, and even proprioception (Parsons, 2014).Slower
movement → deeper body awareness.Less external stimulation → more space & capacity for internal orientation.
• Cultural & Anthropological Patterns
Across cultures, winter has always been associated with thresholds: endings, initiations, story work, and identity
transitions (Eliade, 1959; van Gennep, 1960).It is a season structurally designed for letting go. So when old stories, fatigue, or misaligned habits surface in winter, it is not a default. This is orientation in action.
Winter creates the conditions for release by shifting the body and mind toward clarity rather than distraction.
Winter orientates you back toward yourself. It invites you to tap into the deeper layers you can’t access when life is moving more quickly in other seasons.
This is why so many people feel a tug toward reflection, simplification, or release at this time of year.
Winter creates the conditions for letting go in a way that’s wise, measured, and grounded.
It invites you to cross thresholds with intention instead of falling through them.
Letting Go vs. Collapse: A Crucial Distinction
Winter brings an instinct to “let things fall.” But letting go is not the same as dropping away from yourself. This distinction matters because winter thresholds can trigger either path and most people only notice the collapse when it’s already happening.
Intentional release feels like:
Quiet clarity
A subtle exhale
A sense of alignment
Less tension, more availability
A grounded “yes” and a clean “no”
Collapse feels like:
Numbing
Avoidance
Emotional drop-off
Burnout disguised as relief (Creswell et al., 2014)
Losing access to your inner leadership
Many people wait until collapse forces their change.
But that’s not winter’s wisdom.
Winter asks for small, strategic, honest releases, not self-erasure. This is the difference between crossing a threshold consciously or being dragged across it.
The Three Winter Thresholds (and Why They Matter Now)
Winter doesn’t ask for dramatic reinvention. It asks for selective release.
The kind of release that strengthens your identity instead of destabilizing it.
This is why thresholds matter: they show you exactly where letting go would create coherence rather than collapse.
These three thresholds show up repeatedly in my coaching work:
1. Identity Thresholds
Winter quiets the external noise enough for us to notice the identities that feel too tight or outdated. Letting go here is less about discarding and more about loosening & making space for who you’re becoming (Tsakiris, 2017). It is an alignment of values and action.
These often sound like:
“I’m outgrowing this version of myself.”
“I don’t want to keep performing like this.”
“Something in me wants to evolve…and I’m scared.”
I find it interesting to note that, identity shifts often occur when external stimulation is reduced. A phenomenon supported by research on solitude, liminality, and reflection (Long & Averill, 2003; Ibarra, 2004).Winter’s natural quiet amplifies this process providing the perfect opportunity to cross an identity threshold.
In ecopsychology, identity transitions mirror ecological succession- the way a forest shifts from disturbance to regeneration. Early stages are messy, sparse, and undefined. But they are essential (Fuchs, 2020).
SEELEDU Tip:
Ask: What identity am I quietly outgrowing? What identity am I making space for?
Name both. Treat this like pruning: targeted, intentional, supportive of growth.
2. Habit Thresholds
Winter shines a light on the habits that quietly drain you: overworking, emotional unavailability, busywork, perfectionism, doom scrolling, self-criticism disguised as “standards.”
These patterns don’t need judgment.They need interruption. Intentional release…not collapse.
Winter also disrupts your rhythms. Light changes, routines shift, sleep fluctuates, motivation dips. All normal experiences in winter. Behavioral science shows that habits require cue clarity. Winter naturally invites a disruption to many cues and with awareness into your environment, you can cross a habit threshold.
SEELEDU Tip:
Choose one micro-habit to carry through winter; not to perform, but to anchor you.
Examples:
A 6-minute breathwork ritual
A daily outdoor moment
A warm evening beverage without your phone
3. Relationship Thresholds
Across cultures, winter is historically linked to communal reflection, repairing bonds, and reconciling tensions before active spring work begins (Eliade, 1959). Attachment theory and social ecology research also shows that seasonal shifts can make relational stressors more visible and increase the need for social buffering- the stress-regulating effects of healthy connection (Bronfenbrenner, 1994; Mikulincer & Shaver, 2016).
Winter gives you the space to ask the honest questions:
What is reciprocal? What is draining? What is seasonal?
SEELEDU Tip:
Ask: Where am I leaking energy through emotional labor, unclear boundaries, or unspoken resentments?Then identify one relational pattern you’re ready to unclench.
Letting go here may look like kinder boundaries, less availability, or deeper honesty. It doesn’t have to be a severing of connections, but rather a recalibrating of connections.
Integration Is Active, Not Passive
Letting go doesn’t happen simply because the season changes. Integration is the process of crossing thresholds intentionally—choosing alignment, clarity, and coherence (Kabat-Zinn, 2013).
A winter integration practice can therefore include:
naming what you’re releasing
choosing what stays
creating one new micro-habit
recalibrating your relationships
facing a story you’ve been avoiding
making space for small joy
somatic practices
When you integrate actively, winter becomes a season of coherence, not collapse.
If You’re Navigating a Threshold, You Don’t Have to Do It Alone
This is the heart of my winter coaching work and a core theme of the Waldhexen Retreat (October 2026): how to move through identity shifts, transitions, and inner seasons without losing yourself.
If you want guided support with the subtler work like clarity, boundaries, identity transitions, and energy recalibration, my 1:1 coaching offers a structured, grounded space to do this work well.
Winter asks you to pause, reflect and refine.
Coaching helps you do it with direction rather than collapse.
If you’d like to explore this deeper:
Author & Photographer: Justine Ferland
Justine Ferland is a passionate psychologist, integrative coach, and educator who brings over 20 years of experience to her work. As the founder of SEELEDU, she specializes in integrating nature for enhanced well-being.
References
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